I’m not sure why I take the Myers-Briggs Personality Inventory Test (www.myersbriggs.org) thinking at some point I’m going to have a different “type.” I’ve taken it several times, and while I feel like I know myself rather well, I am still surprised every time to find out I”m an
INFJ- Introvert (100%), Intuition (12%), Feeling (12%) and Judging (44%). While the percentages of the last 3 vary somewhat from test to test, I am always, always an introvert. I speak in public on the topic of peace and have created a program for women on finding inner peace in their lives, often facilitating workshops in the community. And while I believe I am an effective and engaged presenter and have received positive feedback for my presentations, the ability to present is something that is difficult for me emotionally every time I do it.
I remember being a child and looking at friends or classmates who were outgoing and seemed to be able to enter into conversation easily, never looking or appearing awkward or nervous. These same classmates ran for school office, tried out for leads in the play, and were captains of their preferred sports or academic groups. I, however, spent much of my time observing, listening, and preferred time to be with smaller groups or individuals. I remember thinking “there must be something wrong with me, why can’t I be like them?”
“Be yourself, everyone else is already taken.” Oscar Wilde
In adulthood, I recognize my introversion as a personality trait not unlike my ability to empathize with others, to be calm in the midst of chaos, to be comforting and engaged when others are hurting….it is who I am. And while I felt somewhat inferior as a child because I “wasn’t” an extrovert, as an adult I’m able to not only accept, but rather honor that part of me who makes me…well…. me!
In clinical practice, I often work with clients who are trying to make changes to better their lives, and one topic that often presents is the desire to have more of a social life- to be more connected with large groups of people- and to have more excitement in one’s life. Why? I think…… is this necessary for fulfillment in life? Where did the notion come from in thinking that a fulfilling life= large circles of friends and being at the center of attention in a room.
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
True happiness comes, rather, in accepting who we are. Not wanting to be one of the masses, to just squeak on by, but to celebrate the quirkiness- the flaws- the idiosyncrasies that make each of us unique. And while the “child” in me longed to be someone I wasn’t…….longed to be one the “in crowd”…..the wise woman in me celebrates the calm that has come in not only celebrating who I am, but enabling others to be proud of themselves too.
One of my favorite poems…for kids….but equally fitting for adults….may be all be kids at heart……
So being an introvert doesn’t make me a shy/less than person in relation to my extroverted peers. It makes me, me. And why would I really want to be anyone else?
So who are you, really?
Are you celebrating the one and only you today?
May you find peace and joy in your search today…..And know no matter who you are….you’re beautiful just the way you are.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAfyFTzZDMM
Peace,
peaceinthejourney 