One of my favorite quotes on peace reads “If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.” Mother Teresa.
I’ve been writing in this blog for over a year. All in pursuit of finding some inner peace and sharing with others how the path unfolds for me. In the past year, the journey has not always been pretty, but I have attempted to make it genuine and work towards sharing my authentic thoughts. I’ve attempted to convey my own struggles in this path towards peace in honor of my belief that we are somehow all connected on this journey and therefore my struggles are in somehow meaningful for others in finding their own inner peace on their path. Does that make sense?
I was asked recently if I was concerned, as a therapist, that my “stuff” is out there on the internet. The person asking me was wondering what current or possible clients would say if they were to read my blog. For a moment I was flooded with thoughts of insecurity and doubt thinking perhaps my decision to blog was wrong, and in some ways my effort to strip down my well established “walls” was in retrospect a mistake. Then I thought (even though my full name isn’t even on my blog) about the quote I started this entry with today….
“….we belong to each other”
While there is something incredibly appealing in having others view me as having all my “stuff together”, I am acutely aware that it isn’t in my sharing of my triumphs that people find me authentically appealing, rather it is in my struggles. After all, is it true or not that everyone has “stuff” in their life, it’s what we learn from our struggles and how we choose to grow from them that matters, right? And over this past year, I am confidently say I no longer care if people see me as “flawed.” In fact, I celebrate it! If I have inspired but one person to face their struggles with a greater sense of courage by exposing my own, then I consider it all worth it. And wow! It’s truly liberating!
So the year has been filled with joys and sorrows for me. The yin/yang of life. Just when I have felt like I’ve had this “peace journey” all figured out….Bam! I’m thrown some sort of tragedy/drama/angst I must face. In review, I realize 2013 has ended not strikingly dissimilar to 2012. Once again dealing with several people dying, and several around me having serious health issues. I am reminded of the fragility of life….and in my quiet meditation, my contemplation of “what’s it all about Alfy”…..I think back to a message I received from a friend a few months back….
Struggling with my own physical pain (piriformis syndrome) and frustration with my marathon running performance…. there have been days this past year I’ve just been despondent. Trivial, I admit, given the real issues listed above others around me are facing….
Ever receive a message from someone that is exactly what you needed to hear exactly when you needed to hear it? Father Dave (family parish Priest) would call these things “God-incidences” rather than “coincidences”…. He writes…..
Quote from Socrates “how singular is this thing called pleasure, and how curiously related to pain, which might be thought to be the opposite of it. Yet he who pursues either is generally compelled to take the other.”…..
Nothing good in life comes without struggle. Pain is often a symbol of that struggle. And while 2013 has been laden with struggle, for my friends in far more devastating ways than my own, it is in the struggles that we learn the most.
I concur with my friend. I no longer fear pain. I no longer fear struggles. I fear stagnation and fear complacency and hope 2014 brings me a greater sense of strength and peace so that I can be there for others who need me.
Last parting lesson I learned in 2013, and one that I hope to carry into 2014.
I started yoga. Yes, this marathon runner is now balancing life as a newbie yoga enthusiast. In class on Saturday, the instructor said these words (in her explanation on spirituality)……”spirituality is the gradual turning away from selfishness and towards selflessness.”
Let my actions/intentions in all that I do, with everything I have in me, in the coming year be in my ongoing commitment to better serve others…..because it is truly in my service to others (and remembering in doing so I need to take care of myself- i.e. yoga/running) that I truly find happiness and peace….
Happy almost New Year’s Eve.
peaceinthejourney 